FUCK YEAH, CHARACTER ACTORS

THE REAL HEROES OF SHOWBIZ

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FUCK YEAH, DAN HEDAYA. What a mug on this guy, this ubiquitous beacon of sleaze—those pop-out eyes, those caterpillar brows, the imposing nose, and of course that chin, the evil twin of Cary Grant’s cleft. Whether he’s goofing off on a sitcom or plotting sinister acts in a noir, one thing’s for sure: do not fucking trust a Dan Hedaya character. Noteworthy roles: • Doomed noir anti-hero of the Coen brothers’ Blood Simple (damn, I haven’t seen this movie since high school) • No-good, lyin’, cheatin’ ex-husband of Carla on beloved sitcom Cheers; reprised this character, for some reason, on short-lived and long-forgotten Cheers spinoff The Tortellis (with Jean Kasem, wife of Casey, as his bimbo bride) • One of the mysterious Castigliane brothers in David Lynch’s Mulholland Drive, gangsters (?) who strongarm the casting process of Adam Kesher’s film and demand that Camilla be given the lead; better do what the fuck Hedaya tells you, dude • Rich daddy in Clueless (one of the nicer Hedaya characters, if memory serves, but still kind of a creep) • Tricky Milhous himself in the Nixon comedy Dick; what better way to cap off two decades of playing crooks than with a comic riff on American history’s most famous crook? AND MANY MORE!!!

FUCK YEAH, DAN HEDAYA. What a mug on this guy, this ubiquitous beacon of sleaze—those pop-out eyes, those caterpillar brows, the imposing nose, and of course that chin, the evil twin of Cary Grant’s cleft. Whether he’s goofing off on a sitcom or plotting sinister acts in a noir, one thing’s for sure: do not fucking trust a Dan Hedaya character.

Noteworthy roles:

• Doomed noir anti-hero of the Coen brothers’ Blood Simple (damn, I haven’t seen this movie since high school)

• No-good, lyin’, cheatin’ ex-husband of Carla on beloved sitcom Cheers; reprised this character, for some reason, on short-lived and long-forgotten Cheers spinoff The Tortellis (with Jean Kasem, wife of Casey, as his bimbo bride)

• One of the mysterious Castigliane brothers in David Lynch’s Mulholland Drive, gangsters (?) who strongarm the casting process of Adam Kesher’s film and demand that Camilla be given the lead; better do what the fuck Hedaya tells you, dude

• Rich daddy in Clueless (one of the nicer Hedaya characters, if memory serves, but still kind of a creep)

• Tricky Milhous himself in the Nixon comedy Dick; what better way to cap off two decades of playing crooks than with a comic riff on American history’s most famous crook?

AND MANY MORE!!!

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FUCK YEAH, RICHARD EDSON. Not only is he a distinctive, highly idiosyncratic actor adept at playing lowlifes and sad-sacks, he was also the original drummer for Sonic Youth! Seriously! Noteworthy roles: • Drifter companion of John Lurie in Jim Jarmusch’s debut feature Stranger Than Paradise, also Edson’s acting debut • Sal’s younger son and one of the three main whiteys (the least racist one!) in Spike Lee’s Do the Right Thing • Partner-in-crime of revenge-seeking ex-con in the third season finale of Homicide: Life on the Street, an episode uncharacteristically told from the criminals’ POV instead of the cops’. • Ex-husband of Edie Falco and lowlife gambler associate of Christopher Lloyd, respectively, in a pair of John Sayles films, separated by 14 years: Sunshine State and Eight Men Out • Tragic school janitor in a classic episode of The Adventures of Pete and Pete that had a huge impact on me and burned the image of Richard Edson onto my soul forever AND MANY MORE!!!

FUCK YEAH, RICHARD EDSON. Not only is he a distinctive, highly idiosyncratic actor adept at playing lowlifes and sad-sacks, he was also the original drummer for Sonic Youth! Seriously!

Noteworthy roles:

• Drifter companion of John Lurie in Jim Jarmusch’s debut feature Stranger Than Paradise, also Edson’s acting debut

• Sal’s younger son and one of the three main whiteys (the least racist one!) in Spike Lee’s Do the Right Thing

• Partner-in-crime of revenge-seeking ex-con in the third season finale of Homicide: Life on the Street, an episode uncharacteristically told from the criminals’ POV instead of the cops’.

• Ex-husband of Edie Falco and lowlife gambler associate of Christopher Lloyd, respectively, in a pair of John Sayles films, separated by 14 years: Sunshine State and Eight Men Out

• Tragic school janitor in a classic episode of The Adventures of Pete and Pete that had a huge impact on me and burned the image of Richard Edson onto my soul forever

AND MANY MORE!!!

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FUCK YEAH, GARRET DILLAHUNT, who has built a career on obfuscating his natural movie-star handsomeness with a thick coat of scuzzy, oft-nefarious regional Americana. Noteworthy roles: •Two (2) separate malicious weirdos on HBO’s Deadwood, a veritable storehouse of great character actors •Marauding bandit of the post-apocalypse in John Hillcoat’s The Road •Scared-shitless potential snitch outlaw hunted and killed by Brad Pitt in The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford •Leader of inbred hillbilly psycho murderer clan in the recent remake of The Last House on the Left •Jesus Christ (literally) in swiftly cancelled NBC series The Book of Daniel, some kind of religious satire that also featured James Rebhorn! •Bonus upcoming role: Southern sheriff in soon-to-be-released Sundance buzz magnet Winter’s Bone AND MANY MORE!!!

FUCK YEAH, GARRET DILLAHUNT, who has built a career on obfuscating his natural movie-star handsomeness with a thick coat of scuzzy, oft-nefarious regional Americana.

Noteworthy roles:

•Two (2) separate malicious weirdos on HBO’s Deadwood, a veritable storehouse of great character actors

•Marauding bandit of the post-apocalypse in John Hillcoat’s The Road

•Scared-shitless potential snitch outlaw hunted and killed by Brad Pitt in The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford

•Leader of inbred hillbilly psycho murderer clan in the recent remake of The Last House on the Left

•Jesus Christ (literally) in swiftly cancelled NBC series The Book of Daniel, some kind of religious satire that also featured James Rebhorn!

•Bonus upcoming role: Southern sheriff in soon-to-be-released Sundance buzz magnet Winter’s Bone

AND MANY MORE!!!